For training last year a few of us met monthly and 1 or 2 participants shared an aspect of their lives while the others listened. Each person was given 10-15 minutes to portray their journeys in whatever ways they saw fit. No-one else spoke during this time, so the speaker could take whatever pauses and silences they chose, because no-one interrupted. And no-one judged, so you were free to express yourself, without fear of having to hear another’s appraisal of your situation.
As a listener, you would never be asked to comment about the situation, so the point was never to listen with the intent of giving your opinion or judging another’s circumstances. Our egos often make comparison’s when others are talking, relating our stories to theirs or connecting them in some way based on our perceptions. At these meetings we were encouraged to listen at a soul level, for the spirit within the participants and within ourselves.
I stopped listening to my own internal dialogue because that point of view wasn’t needed for the process, and I began hearing in ways that I hadn’t before. As I truly witnessed, I felt the Spirit move within the story teller, within me, and in all those present. l often became aware of threads of deep truths within the stories I heard, as I felt other’s emotions while being acutely aware of my own. How I would have responded in their situation was never relevant, and neither was any advice I might have to give.
When the story teller was finished we waited 2 minutes in silence. Then one by one we would reflect back to the speaker what we heard in their story. This wasn’t a practice in memory work, but more a way of letting the person know how you perceived his or her journey, and how you heard their soul speaking. It was interesting how everyone often heard different but meaningful points emphasized. And it was enlightening for the story teller to hear intuitive messages when your story was reflected back to you.
Once that process was complete we waited 2 more minutes in silence. Then we each shared what was evoked within ourselves while listening to the story. We are often unaware of our triggers or our own spiritual stirrings when we are not listening deeply. This way we were encouraged to witness our own awakenings, while listening to others.
After a final brief time of silence the story teller was given a few minutes to reflect back based on the comments they heard. It was always a time of thanksgiving as the person who had opened themselves up were grateful for the chance to speak and be heard.
Don’t we all just sometimes need to speak and be heard? Couldn’t this process be used every day, and in all conversations to some degree? I thought yes, so I started doing “the process” or my version of “the process” in conversations away from the spiritual journey group. And you know what? When people realize they are truly being listened to they relax and open up like never before. I don’t mean “listen to” in a salesman type of way, where you listen for the person’s problems so you can offer the solution, but listening in a way that you are able to hear that the person has within them the answer to every question, the steps to every goal, the light to every path.
Spiritual listening is one of those gifts that when used consistently will progress your relationships and your understanding of yourself and others in ways far better than you could ever imagine.
Learn and practice the art of soul listening … http://www.christinacrawford.ca/calendar/
Great post. I think we all need some practice when it comes to listening. How many times when we are listening to someone’s story do we interject with our own personal point of view or story. The story teller doesn’t have a chance to ever completely finish.
I cannot wait to come to your workshop and learn how to truly listen in order to become a much better listener.